In the Garden of the Night

"The night is black,
And the stars are bright,
And the sea is dark and deep

And someone I know is safe
And snug, and the're drifting
Off to sleep
Round and round, a little boat no bigger
Than you're hand, out on the ocean, far away from land.

Take the little sail down,
Light the little light.
This is the way to the
Garden of the night"

Or Isle of the Dead as it should be known. Iggle Piggle (clearly an offshoot from the Hills Have Eyes Clan) guides you there as the eponymous ferryman - you'll notice he never sleeps until the end, ever watchful is Charon. There you are met and judged by Minos (Father Christmas), Sobek (the Crocodile from Punch & Judy/Peter Pan)
and probably Macca Pacca (a suspicious creature with the bodyshape of uncle Jesse from Dukes of Hazard who looks like he has had mouldering dog turds glued to him and then painted pink). If you have been very good you can spend eternity in Nigel Slater's herb garden eating his simple meals and pissing all over the rosemary.

For the rest of us it is the Night Garden itself - an endless purgatory populated by those whose souls hang in balance and their wardens.


With snakes for hair one of the Erinnyes pursues the denizens of the garden.

The Hahoos - imprisoned there by the gods of Olympus after their revolt lead by Typhon.

The Pontipines and the Wottingers - two houses alike in dignity, perhaps once known as Montagues and Capulets

The three-headed guard - Tombliboos - a grim wide-eyed Cerberus

All under the watchful eyes of Macca Pacca from his cave.

Lucky it's only for children or I'd be terrified.